my name is grim

May fanfiction cross my path
May HPFFA be the start of my career
May FanFiktion dot de welcome me
May fanfiction dot net appreciate my constant efforts

May ArchiveOfOurOwn keep its cool name
May Twitter tweet nice shit
May GMX help me out with my emails
May my website does not steal too much time

But may Harry Potter stay in my heart
And may the Weasleys stay in my memories
May Voldemort stay in the books
May Hogwarts still be a home

May Gryffindors kiss Slytherins
May Draco be evil but a hot guy
May Hermione remain a plodder
May Ginny make funny jokes

May Lily scream at James
May James ask her for dates
May they love each other
May they be a comedy pairing

May Remus be Moony who is the real manipulator (I believe in his government!)
May Sirius get his bike to fly in Flitwick's porridge
May Peter have a reason for being a marauder
And may the Marauders be the Marauders

May Dumbledore have weird ideas
May McGonagall just be called Gonnie (NOT! I hate this!)
May Lockhart be impaled by his valentine-dwarfs
May Quirrel be titled "Squirrel"

May Crabbe and Goyle talk about dumb things (because I love this ...)
May Blaise love a Gryffindor or Astoria
May Draco love a Gryffindor
May Theodore Nott be the head boy (or Draco or Blaise or another hottie)

May Ron eat a lot of stuff and be stupid (how silly writers can be ...)
May Harry lose control and batter the one Slytherin
May Neville love Luna just lunatic
May Lavender be a bitch (or the "girlfriend of Ron who gives us writers the chance for a change")

May Tom Riddle kill guys but keep up being sexy
May Severus make it with his female pupils (or male ...)
May Lucius have a threesome with Remus and Sirius
May Harry's parents never exist

May Mary Sues control the school
May sixteen years old Beauxbatons-girls receive the letter
May all boys adore them
May all girls hate them but without doubting their hair colour

BUUUT ... May canon never miss my mind
May P18 stories get the most of the readers (because that's okay, it is the curiosity)
May bad language just stay away
And may beta readers be our little angels

So may words protect my sentences
May punctuation follows me everywhere
May commas fix my subclauses
May dots never say Goodbye to ends

May fantasy keep in touch with my heart
May love stories play with my emotions
May suspense laugh about my stomach aches
May comedy jinx sadness and spend me tears (of happiness)

May short stories' cliffhangers make my followers suffer
May drabbles do not dominate the present
May longtime stories wink at me
May books keep this all

May music inspire me anytime
May feelings of strangers give my muse a high five
May copy and paste never be normal
May inspiration come to me

And may magic enchant me
Always
Because all was well